Joke of the Day!

Thirty rabbits in a row hopping backwards - what have you got?

A receding hair (hare) line!

Oooo... may have to start pulling out my hair now

*Groan*

Two lions walking down the aisle of a supermarket, one turns to the other and says "Quiet in here today, isn't it!!!

Hope you roar with laughter!!!

I had to laugh, 'cause it's terrible

Saying that, the old one liners are the best

I thought this one was especially bad.......... here goes,

my son sat watching a film the other night turned to his dad and me, with a very thoughtful look on his face and said 'you know what I don't understand mum'
I turned to him and replied 'whats that hun?' and in a rather serious voice he answered ' chinese writing'.........
it made me laugh at the time but bless him the look on his little face as he laughed.............after all he is only........18 next month!!!!!

Why did the mexican shoot his wife?


Tequila!!

good grief dee, that is def a 'groan'

chell
x

Oh dear Dee....they're getting worse!!

That is really a big *GROAN*

Pink Pixie wrote:

I thought this one was especially bad.......... here goes,

my son sat watching a film the other night turned to his dad and me, with a very thoughtful look on his face and said 'you know what I don't understand mum'
I turned to him and replied 'whats that hun?' and in a rather serious voice he answered ' chinese writing'.........
it made me laugh at the time but bless him the look on his little face as he laughed.............after all he is only........18 next month!!!!!

Ahhhh bless

Dee Coopage wrote:

Why did the mexican shoot his wife?


Tequila!!

I liked that

What do you call a man in a paper suit?








Russell!!

No, no, no,,,,,,,

Aw they are BAD!!! lol!!!

These are from my 7 year old...

How do snails keep their shells shiny?

They use snail varnish!


What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud!

enjoy

Love em!

A television and an aerial get married. The ceremony went welll, but the reception was awful.

I'm going to curl up in the corner and cry

Good to see you're all joining in!! Love the aerial joke, egg sandwich!

What has four legs and goes "Boo"






A cow with a cold!!!!!!!

A dog is sitting in the cinema with its owner. The dog stares at the screen intently and growls whenever the villain appears and wags its tail whenever the hero comes on. An old lady has been watching the dogs behaviour. She turns to the owner and says "That's extraordinary behaviour from your dog". "You're right" said the owner. "it is suprprising - he hated the book"!!

Aaaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhhh!!!!!!!

A man is walking down the street when he hears calling from a shed...'Let me out....let me out!'

The man looks into the shed window but can only see a greyhound. As he walks away he hears the same shout...'Let me out, let me out.'

Peering through the door the man calls out to anyone inside. To his surprise the greyhound starts talking to him. The dog tells him that he is a champion pedigree, that he has won loads of trophies, and has even won the greyhound derby, now his owner is annoyed with him and keeps him in the shed all of the time.

The man thinks 'Wow a talking dog I can make a fortune, so he knocks on the house door.

The owner answers and the passer by asks if he would sell the greyhound. The owner refuses so the man offers him £50. Again a refusal so the man offers £100. The owner refuses again so after a few more offers and rejections the passer by offers £20000 for the greyhound. The owner still refuses.

The passer by is bewildered and asks the owner why he wouldn't sell his greyhound for £20000 but would just keep him locked up in a shed to which the owner replies,

'It's quite simple.....He's a liar!'

i hope this doesn't offend, but here goes....


A teacher said to her 6 year old class, what have you been doing since yesterday.. and one boy said he had found a dead cat..
How did you know it was dead, she asked..
Cos I p*ssed in it's ear and it didn't move... The teacher said did I hear you right..
and the boy said , Yes miss. I leant down real close and went Pssst in its ear really loud. but it didn't move......


chell
x

How I love this thread!!

Man to waitress in Chinese restaurant "Excuse me, but this chicken is rubbery". Waitress - "Thank you very much sir"!!!!!!

A man goes to a fancy dress party with a woman draped over his shoulders and says he has come as a tortoise. "Who's that on your back?" asks the host. "That's Michelle" says the man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!